It's about that time...

eddie and the rat
Originally uploaded by tink927.

Yep, my brother's been gone for almost 2 years and days like today, it feels like an eternity. I still talk to the crazy booger all the time and miss him more every day.

I feel lucky to have the special memories we made together and feel blessed for the lessons I learned following his death. It's not like bad country music lyrics, I don't choose to live like I'm dying, but I sure don't waste time worrying about this and that, wishing I had more or hating anyone or anything for any reason. I live like I'm alive. In a way, I'm living for him. I know that sounds crazy, but really, when I hear a super bluesy tune, I love it for both of us. When I take a cool picture, I take it for both of us. When I hear MC Hammer, I dance like a retard for both of us. Every roller coaster I ride, he rides with me. Every beautiful building I see has his spirit in the details.

His widow often tells me how it drove him crazy watching me make the same mistakes he made (which I definately have.) I hope he can see how much I learned from him, in his life on earth and his life now.